Wednesday 29 March 2017

Quick Crappy Review: Lego Set 76072 - Marvel Superheroes Mighty Micros Iron Man vs. Thanos*

I bought The Infinity Gauntlet as a complete set from Camden during the earliest days of THE DARK TIMES™ - also known as my Comic Collector Years – and it has been one of my favourite stories since then, it’s an utterly epic tale involving the battle between space Jesus and the man who would literally court death with a battle that comes to involve such power that the human mind and human comic page cannot comprehend it and can only give a rough approximation, it has one of Captain America’s finest moments. So what better way to pay tribute to this than via the medium of dodge’ems?

Saturday 18 March 2017

A Chocolate Kebab*

Romford Market is dying, it’s a fraction of its old size and it’s been my firm belief conspiracy theory that it’s being intentionally killed so it can be replaced with something less troublesome and more trendy, a theory that seems to be being born out with the announcement that they’re planning to develop a third or so of it into a small shopping centre-y thing, trading in a unique selling point and long standing tradition to be like everyone else – how very Romford. So it’s a bit of a surprise to see a new stall and more of a surprise to see someone trying out a new venture, well surprise! This is Charley and this is his Chocolate Kebab Company:

Sunday 12 March 2017

5 Action Figures Identified!*

I have a very wide knowledge of children’s playthings, but if I see a toy – especially an action figure - that I think’s cool I’ll buy it whether I recognise it or not, and that is how you end up with no money and no space despite living in a terrace house. For instance, this tiger:

This art to me. Ok that’s a little exaggeration but not by much, I have no idea where this little bloke came from, he was just on a table amidst various other toys and something about his crudity spoke to me the way antique furniture never does and I wanted him in my house. The thought that he was probably going to end up chewed and thrown away upset me, so now he sits in the box with all my other cheap animals and dinosaurs and has friends and someone who cares about him. Of course I still want to know who made the toy and what line it was released under, that is often harder than it seems (I still haven’t I.D.d Tony up there), even in today’s internet age with forum threads and Facebook pages solely dedicated to identifying toys – they still rely on people who visit them knowing what the fuck your thing is after all. Sometimes though I stumble upon the identity of total stumpers by accident, usually in unrelated Google Images or eBay searches, this post has five action figures(ish) who were I.D.d that way. I’m not saying this is the only place on the web where you can find info on these lines, that would be presumptuous and quite ridiculous (anyway even if it was true it would only be true for about a day before someone posted the info somewhere else), but these have a small enough internet presence that it felt worthwhile doing this. So are you sitting comfortably? Then I’ll begin:   

Atomic Ranger Warriors
1995, Lanard
Of note is that there are 3 ¼ inch versions and one of those was packaged with a water blaster, this is all about 5 inch versions. It’s really weird to see Lanard’s name on a toy that isn’t The Corps and a reminder that just because The Corps has become an accepted brand by us internet dwelling toy nerds it was still a knock-off line from a company that made such things. But it’s also a nice reminder of why the Corps became so accepted and have lasted so long – quality and creativity; the Atomic Ranger Warriors are one of the, if not the, best made vintage Power Rangers knock-offs with thick plastic and a whole heap of joints, these motherfuckers have ball joints, ball joints, on a knock off figure, in 1995! And while most companies were happy to just produce near exact copies of the Power Rangers suits just with enough changes to the chest design and helmet to avoid a lawsuit, Lanard stick with the basic design elements of the Mighty Morphin’ ones enough to confuse parents into buying their wares but go off into their own Lazer Tag meets Rob Liefeld world, these guys could just has easily have fought Darkhawk or been playable in a poor selling NES game as be rip-offs of Jason, Kimberly et all. Some of that may come from Lanard reusing parts (look at my Atomic Ranger, you can clearly see the vest sculpted into his torso) to approximate a Power Ranger but hey, it works, take the praise where you get it Lanard.