Welcome to what AFB is doing this October, out of a
need for Halloween-y blog content I’ve resorted to just talking about things I’m
always happy to talk about and have picked some of my favourite horror-themed
things from the quagmire or stuff I enjoy. I’m calling them ‘Favourite Haunts’
because I’m witty like that. We’re starting
off small because I can’t be arsed to make gifs today.
The first American comic
book I ever owned was Giant-Size Werewolf By Night #21.
“That’s a little odd” you
may say if you were real, especially once you’re told that I bought it in
1991-ish and it was published in 1974. I’m going to post the cover; I feel this
should clear up any questions:
Frankenstein vs the Wolf
Man? Fuck yeah! I’m sure a lot of parents would prefer their five year olds
never get within 15 feet of a horror movie but as far as my dad, his brother
and their father was concerned you are a bad human being if you can’t quote
Universal Studios’ Dracula, so they started me off young and I took to these
old films instantly, honestly I took anything monster-ish instantly, by
1991-ish I was a confirmed Real Ghostbusters fanatic. Anyway I may have told
this tale before but fuck it: my local shops are all built around a roundabout
and that roundabout is roughly 11 houses from the house I grew up in, the road
it’s on backs onto one of the rows of shops. As a child my mum had dragged me
‘up the top’ one day to do whatever she needed to do, which involved going to
the chemist (what is now Boots, it used to be Time Pharmacy back before
everything was a chain store). As being in a chemist is crushingly boring for
adults let alone children I got permission to hop one or two shops down and
visit a charity shop that isn’t there anymore, it was, I think a cat-based
charity. In the shop, which always smelt, was a box of various magazines, I’d
gone in looking for toys but having seen THAT cover on the top of this little
box of periodicals I picked it up, flicked through and asked how much it was,
the woman behind the counter gave it to me for free, dismissing it ‘that little
thing’, so I have that old lady to thank for decades of being a sad bastard,
thanks lady!
So the issue itself, it’s
written by Doug ‘I really love Batman’ Moench and drawn by Don Perlin with
Vince Coleletta on ink and it’s pretty weird in that delightful 1970s monster
comic way. How does it begin? With a piece of cack-handed social commentary as
observed by the Frankenstein’s Monster, I’m not kidding:
This is all part of pretty
damn effective prologue showing the loneliness of the Frankenstein’s Monster as
he shambles from scene to scene never truly being part of any of them, eating
live rats and eventually being forced to smash his way out of a box cart, no
that doesn’t do the scene justice, he smashes THROUGH a box-cart and falls off
a cliff, bouncing on the way. Meanwhile
Lissa Russel, sister of Jack Russel aka Werewolf by Night (yes his name really
is Jack Russel), is being stupid. She joined a cult called the Brotherhood of
Baal in the hopes that they had the cure for Jack, they don’t so she storms out
and tells them, basically, she’s an independent woman who don’t need no cult. Let
me repeat that, she JOINED A CULT then BUGGED OUT ON THEM AT THE FIRST MOMENT,
a cult, who always take well to members leaving. Unsurprisingly they follow her
home and kidnap her leaving a message in blood for the werewolf.
Desperate to get his sister
back, Jack Russel chases the cult to Malibu despite it being a full moon and
wolfs out before he can get there. Meanwhile the head of the Brotherhood of
Baal (dressed in his best pimp suit) does a deal with Frankenstein’s Monster,
he does what they want and he gets a new body, a new face, a chance to fit in.
Off to the sacrifice! The Brotherhood are going to sacrifice Lissa Russel so
they can commune with Satan but accompanied by more floury but ultimately
awesome Doug Moench narration the Werewolf by Night crashes the party.
The actual Frankenstein’s
Monster vs Werewolf by Night fight is actually upsettingly short, lasting only
three pages. Now those pages are bombastic as all get out and again accompanied
by more Moench narration – this issue is full of narration; it has more
narration than everything Brian Michael Bendis has ever written. So it’s a good
fight but a short one, and one that ends with a decisive victory for Franky,
and it’s not even his book! Damn.
When the Werewolf comes too
HE’S going to be sacrificed and the Brotherhood of Baal reveal their purpose,
they’re going to put Satan in Frankenstein’s body. They assumed that Franky was
too dumb to understand this but The Monster wasn’t and figuring out what’s
going on, and how this will kill him or send his soul to hell or both he gets
annoyed and wrecks the Brotherhood’s shit, ultimately crushing it’s leader with
a giant cross and releasing the Werewolf for a quick and well-narrated team-up
as the building burns around them. In a nice moment Lissa makes up for her
earlier cult-based stupidity by freeing herself and escaping and in another
nice moment most of the building falls off of a cliff while on fire into the
sea - fuck me. Lissa declares them dead to the photographer I forgot to mention
to earlier who Jack Russel got the information about the Brotherhood of Baal’s
location from but we’re left with two sets of monstrous footprints in the sand
so us readers get to know that the titular character isn’t really dead and can
all sleep soundly.
So yes, obviously I have a
lot of nostalgia for this issue but even with that taken out it’s not that bad,
it’s very much of a style but a style that I enjoy, the narration is at times
dramatic and not always necessary but always fitting with the subject matter –
two tragic monsters. The opening scene is works great once the two out-of-work
social commentators fuck off and after Lissa has been idiotic the rest of the
story is goes off without a hitch but with some pretty neat moments. It’s not a
masterpiece but it is a nice 70’s Marvel comic book. Was it a good introduction
to Marvel Comics and American comics in general, well no it didn’t work in 1991
but then I was five and didn’t know there was a wider world to be had, I just
wanted to read about monsters beating each other up, it wouldn’t be until the
following year or so with the debut of X-Men
and Batman: The Animated Series that found
there was two whole universes of superheroes out there and they were all
connected by in-universe and behind-the-scenes events2.
Sure Lissa, sure. |
1 Point 1) there’s no Giant-Size Werewolf By Night #1, Giant-Size Werewolf by Night continued the number of Giant-Size Creatures. So it goes Giant-Size Creatures #1, Giant-Size Werewolf By Night #2. Giant-Size Creatures #1 is the first appearance of Greer Nelson as Tigra – previously she’d been The Cat, just a bonus fact there. Point 2) this wouldn’t have been the first American comic book I’d read, at least not technically, as British comics and annuals tend to reprint American material without any fanfare, Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles Adventures reprinted Archie Comics’ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Adventures for instance and I know I’d read some issues of that by this point, Giant-Size Werewolf By Night #2 was the first time I’d read an American Comic Book story in an American Comic Book though - minutiae I know but if I don’t put it I leave myself open to nit-picks.
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