I there wasn't gonna be another of these for a specific X-Character: I have the theory that these are
more fun for me to work out and write than they are for other people to read
and I didn’t think I ‘needed’ to do another one as I thought I had one
definitive look I prefer for the remaining X-Characters (or at least only one
or two) but that turned out to not be the case for Jean Grey, fucking gingers.
Me and Jean Grey have never
been close, Rogue’s my favourite X-Man and Storm is (for me) the hottest X-Man
but I’ve always been kind of ‘whatever’ on Jean: I don’t dislike her and she
(or the Phoenix Force posing as her) has had some great moments but I wouldn’t
say I like her either, she’s always just kind of ‘been there’ for me. I also
don’t find her very attractive, in fact I think she’s kind of uninteresting
physically speaking - This is odd as I’m a massive ’redophile’ and find gingers
to be the most attractive breed of white people1 but for Jean the
only time I found her attractive (and
not just one of her outfits) is very recently when she was played by Sophie
Turner (X-Men: Apocalypse) and as
fine an actress as Turner is (and as pretty as she is) I think she’s a terrible
bit of casting, mostly because she looks very little like Jean Grey, or at
least 616 Jean Grey (and Evolution Jean Grey too now I think about it), so what
I’m saying is the only time I found Jean Grey attractive is when she didn’t
look like Jean Grey. Oh the reason that’s not
on the list? I don’t like her black costume; I did like her ‘graduation’
costume (that’s based on the Jim Lee designed Mutant Genesis/X-Men ’92 cartoon
look) a lot more but not enough to get it on the list. So I don’t really care
either way for Jean Grey as a character and I don’t fancy her, and yet I have a
whole bunch of looks I like for her, I wonder if that’s more likely (because I
don’t have strong feelings on her) or less so (because I don’t have strong feelings
on her)?
Anyway Jean Grey is a bit
complicated: Jean Grey is one of the original X-Men and one of Professor X’s
first students (the fifth to officially join). As a kid her powers kicked in
just as her best friend was about to be run over by a car, physically ‘in her
mind’ at the time of her death, Jean spent some time in a coma before joining
the X-Men. Jean Grey sacrificed herself to save the All-New All Different X-Men
and some allies and pilot them through cosmic rays2, during this an
extra-terrestrial sentient force called The Phoenix Force came to her, took her
form and left her in Jamaica Bay to heal (the cosmic rays having already began
to kill her), this Phoenix was seduced and driven unstable by Mastermind and
became Dark Phoenix, killed a planet then sacrificed herself on the moon. After
this the force tried to return what it took from Jean but she rejected it, so
it found the next best thing, a clone of Jean Mister Sinister was working who
became Madelyn Prior. By the time Jean was eventually found in Jamaica Bay by
the Avengers, Cyclops had married Madelyn and had a child (who became Cable)
however due to a series of events3 the two split up, Prior lost it
and became the Goblin Princess and died and then the memories of both Prior and
the Phoenix Force as Jean Grey were returned to Jean. Jean and Cyclops got
together proper, married and got stuck in the future helping to raise Cyclops’
son, then were the X-Men’s golden couple until Cyclops sacrificed himself to
save X-Man, merged with Apocalypse and then came back with some serious
emotional problems, Jean was then killed by ‘Magneto’ after tapping into the
Phoenix Force herself. So are you…WAKE UP!....are you sitting comfortably? Then
I’ll being:
6. X-Men: The
Movie Action Figure (Version 1)
Debut: X-Men:
The Movie (Toy Biz)
So this was a big deal for
about two minutes in 2000 but 2000 fell right in the deepest recess of THE DARK
TIMES™ when I
was a comic book fanboy extraordinaire. So it looms large in what’s left of my
fragmented memories of this time so this particular look for Jean Grey has
become somewhat big to me. The controversy was that when Jean Grey, Storm and
the Jean Grey pack-in figure that came with Cyclops were released they had a
huge plunging cleavage and Toy Biz thought it was a bit much so they revised
them to have a painted-on bra and then eventually to have a new torso (and
head, well except the pack-in Jean, that stayed with just the painted on bra).
It was a big deal for a short while with collectors scrambling to get the ‘no
bra’ versions and was reported on in magazines like Wizard and Toyfare and I
actually found a no-bra Jean in-store during a holiday to Chicago that year (it
was in a regular toy shop, I still have it carded3). Even though
this controversy surrounded both Storm and Jean I associate it more with Jean,
probably because she had two figures altered, probably because she was usually
the one pictured probably because my third probably because; probably because
the change was more noticeable on Jean Grey’s figure thanks to costume design
and pose (her chest is kind of thrust out). Because this loomed so large at an
impressionable point of my life when I was very focussed on collecting I
genuinely think of this figure first 8/10 times when people mention Jean Grey
and have grown to have great affection for it.
That’s basically why it’s
here, why it’s so low is because I just don’t like Famke Janssen’s casting as
Jean Grey and never have, facially she is just completely wrong for all artwork
of Jean Grey up to that point (I think they were trying to match her to John
Byrne’s drawing of the character if they were trying to match her at all?). I
think Famke Janssen is gorgeous, please don’t think this is a knock on Famke
Janssen’s looks nor for that matter her acting ability or her ability to pull
off being a psychic Mutant acting-wise, it’s just that looks-wise she looks
nothing like Jean Grey and it affects my opinion of the look overall. It
probably shouldn’t - this is Jean Grey in another universe after all – but at
this point it does so it helps it dictate the placing: that and I basically
like it by association, because it was the outfit worn by a controversial and
noteworthy toy.
5. Movie
‘Dark’ Phoenix
Debut: X3: The
Last Stand (20th Century Fox)
Oh god this is the second
look from X3 I’ve put on these lists, I feel dirty. I do genuinely think this
film is utter crap but that doesn’t really relate to whether or not I like how
a character looks in it, and I really like how they did Dark Phoenix, visually.
They manged to make Dark Phoenix so well using only ‘real’ clothes which fits
the aesthetic of the X-Men films, in fact I’d argue that Phoenix!Someone looks
more powerful and regal in this pile of shit than anywhere else: the film uses
this gorgeous flowing jacket-with-corset that flies around when Jean uses her
powers mixed with boots and flowing red hair and Famke Janssen’s face is perfect
for intense resolute powerful beings. So why’s it so low? Same reason as before
- because I hate Famke Janssens’ casting as Jean Grey and it colours my opinion
of the look even though I think Famke Janssen looks beautiful in this outfit.
4. Graduation
Costume
Debut: (Uncanny)
X-Men issue 395
I genuinely find this look
very attractive, it’s a green mini-dress and go-go boots but I find
mini-dresses and go-go boots attractive. That’s it, I like it because I find it
visually pleasing and when worn by a woman (especially a redhead) I find it
attractive, I don’t find Jean Grey attractive as a whole as I said but I do
find some of her looks attractive and really after the Toy Biz figure (which
given that it’s got a huge cleavage and lots of black vinyl isn't unattractive) that’s
going to be a factor in every costume because the outfits stand out more to me
if they make a character I don’t usually find attractive seem attractive
to me. Here though it’s the only bloody reason I have and it’s counteracted by
the fact that it’s really impractical – a mini-skirt and heeled boots is very
attractive yes but they’re not very good for superheroing. I have much less of
a problem with heels on a character if they can fly (or in this case, levitate)
because they do a lot less running and a lot more flying but that ability makes
the dress even less practical, I‘d figure that a good third of Manhattan Island
has seen Marvel Girl’s knickers – I assume they’re yellow, Jean strikes me as
the sort who co-ordinates her undies with her outfit, she’s pretty organised.
Oh yeah, this was her ’graduation’
outfit from the 60’s (can you tell?) when the characters switched out of their
original black/blue and yellow ‘school uniforms’ to individual costumes, in
fact Jean designed these costumes (which just kinda makes the outfit a little
worse when you think about it, she designed her own costume and still put heels
and a short skirt in it) and it established Jean’s signature colours as green
and yellow, a colours scheme she used up until X-Factor 26 in 1988, about 21
years (though she was dead for some of that), I think Don Heck designed it.
3. Ultimate (short hair)
Debut:
Ultimate X-Men issue 1
Before X-Men; Apocalypse I
would have said this was the closest I’d gotten to being attracted to Jean
Grey, and it’s another look from soothing I think’s not very good - letting
Mark Millar’s horrible outlook on everything infect the X-Men was not a way to
win me over. here it’s all the head Adam Kubert gave her this short spikey hair
and lots of earrings and it was really different, really striking but somehow
still seemed to fit Jean Grey, especially young Jean Grey (which she is) who
was pretty much a would-be fashion designer (The Wasp was a fashion designer
too, Stan Lee for ya) so to have a young Jean Grey have a very contemporary
look out of costume (and thus in-costume from the neck up) made/makes a lot of
sense to me. Below the chin we return to my apparent fetish for cute girls
squeezed into shiny vinyl because the costume’s kind of wonky (though it is
reminiscent of the Onslaught Storm costume innit? That must be important
somehow), it’s the original X-Uniform updated for 2000’s aesthetics and it does
a fine job, it’s a bit pointlessly sexy but in this universe Jean Grey was
pointlessly sexy at all times (at least at this stage) so it’s not out of
character. I wasn’t big on the idea of giving the Ultimate X-Men matching
outfits, I know it has a precedent because originally they did wear just that
but they could have kept a unifying design and given them signature colours I
felt BUT because Jean (and Cyke) spent a lot of time in the standard X-Uniform
colours (blue & yellow or black & yellow6) I didn’t have an
issue there, and this is one of those two characters. So yeah this is here
because I like her hair and like seeing boobs in vinyl apparently, I feel a bit
shallow and pathetic really.
2. Phoenix
Debut: (on the
Phoenix Force as Jean Grey) (Uncanny) X-Men issue 101
(on Jean Grey) Uncanny
X-Men issue 354
I initially thought this
was cheating and left it off, then I remembered that Jean did wear it for a
short while after Operation: Zero Tolerance thanks to a sub-plot that ended up
going nowhere cos the writers got taken off the books, so here it is. this is
above Ultimate (which I find more attractive) because this is just (for me) an
outfit and look that really works, the Ultimate look is hot despite itself while this
is a great costume: it’s colour schemes, it’s balance of colours, it’s long
boots and gloves, a simple but striking logo that’s easy to replicate (always a
good thing in comics when you have to do this a lot), the mix of shiny and mat
fabric, the sash (I love a nice sash) and logn ginger hair to compliment it
colours-wise and finish it off dwitefry-finds-it-attractive-wise it all comes
together. It’s simple without looking lazy or under-designed and I’m just
throwing buzz words out because I’m reaching for things to type, ooh I know,
more of that signature colour bullshit: Unlike say Rogue (green), Psylocke
(purple) or Storm (black) Jean has had a few signature colours & colour
schemes that designers flip-flop between and all of which are pretty much on
the same level as one another – green/green & yellow, red/red & yellow
and the standard X-Uniform colours of blue & yellow (Shadowcat, Dani
Moonstone, Karma and Cyclops also have that colours scheme as their signature
schemes too) and going by this it seems that I don’t have an overall preference
as we have six entries two each for each scheme, spoilers? I think you can
probably see number 1 when reading this so fuck it.
1. Post-Fall
of the Mutants
Debut:
X-Factor issue 26
This is going to be a bit
of a shit entry and I worry it’s going to make the list a bit of a shit list
because this is my number 1 choice and I really don’t know for certain why this
is so. Some of it are reasons I’ve been using throughout these posts; it’s
simple but effective, it’s sexy without being pointlessly revealing (though it
is tight it’s no tighter than the boy versions), it’s practical, it has long
(ginger) hair worn down which I find attractive, it has a design element that I
just have a random hard-on for (those pirate-like boots, fucking love them,
it’s Captain America’s fault) and I associate it with things I really like
(Walt Simonson and Inferno) but that’s true for lots of other costumes who
didn’t make the number 1 slot, maybe it’s being a combination of them all?
Maybe it’s how those things are true for this particular costume? Maybe it’s as
simple as liking a design I already like (this was shared by all of X-Factor at
this point in the comic) but liking it in yellow and red the most? Maybe I just
find redheads particularly attractive when they’re in red and I’m that shallow?
Maybe it’s all of that? I don’t really know but I know that this is really IS
my favourite outfit, it does look nice too doesn’t it? Nice colours; that nice
big X that somehow doesn’t look ridiculous; good as both a team uniform and a
superhero costume; based on the original uniform used for an X-Team (that Jean
was in) but tweaked to make it sexier, unique for each character and with a
more X-based design: It’s very visually pleasing. I suck, I’m sorry. Hopefully
just the placing will make you re-think your opinion on what generally seems to
be a more forgotten Jean Grey costume? No? Oh well…
I’m finally done with these
X-Looks things, well for X-Looks thing dedicated to one X-Man, maybe, probably,
almost certainly. I’ve decided my goal with these is to make readers remember
stories with these outfits and go and re-read them, that’s my story and I’m
sticking to it. Thanks for reading these.
1
no I’m not using this terminology seriously, I am serious about preferring
redheads though.
2
the cosmic rays that transformed the Fantastic Four are an annual cosmic event,
really.
3
basically Cyclops went to see for himself if Jean Grey was back from the dead,
pissing off Madelyn who told if he left he shouldn’t’ come back, he tried
repeatedly to call his wife but couldn’t get through; during this time (when he
was somewhat emotionally fucked and thought he’d been chucked) Angel talked him
into joining X-Factor. When he finally went to find her he couldn’t locate her
or his son but her body washed up while he was up where she was living so he
considered her head. In truth Mr Sinister had sent the Marauders after Madelyn
and she had escaped, joined up with the X-Men and faked her death in Dallas so
living under the radar in Australia until she resurfaced as the Goblin Queen.
His son Chris had been taken by Nanny (it was her thing) and the Orphan Maker
and was rescued by X-Factor before being sent into the future to be raised by
the Askan’I, the boss of whom was his half-sister from another timeline Rachel
Summers aka Phoenix II, GOD THE SUMMERS ARE COMPLICATED! Oh the body that
washed up was a clone.
4
I kept it carded then for ‘value’ but now I keep it carded to prevent the
Senator Kelly pack-in figure from degrading, splitting and spilling it’s guts
everywhere – fitting for the character but not very good if you want to keep
the figure un-ruined.
5
the comic book known as Uncanny X-Men originally was simply ‘X-Men’ in the
copyright notice for many years (it did eventually change to Uncanny X-Men) but
for reasons I’ve never got mostly these issues are referred to ‘(Uncanny)
X-Men’ rather than ‘X-Men Volume 1’, which would be technically correct, and
‘X-Men’ (the adjectiveless series that became New X-Men and X-Men Legacy that
was launched in the early 90’s) isn’t generally known as ‘X-Men Volume 2’, even
though that’s technically correct *shrug*.
6
the inconsistency in this really bugs me, I think it’s pretty clear that the
original X-Men school uniforms were supposed to be yellow and black (blue then
being the common colour to use on highlights on black) and this seemed to be
true through Chris Claremont’s early years when Kitty Pryde and the New Mutants
explicitly used black and yellow but then later on (with Claremont still on the
typewriter) the standard X-Uniform was switched to blue and yellow and the
names Blue and Gold were used for the two squads in reference to the original
school uniforms and then when the New Mutants reformed they used blue and yellow
instead of black and yellow.
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